TV Commentor - And back to the ring we go as we have a special contest for you. It's Todd "The Toad" Daugherty taking on Lloyd "Lardass" Davies in the ring. Now to our announcer.
Howard Finkel is your ring announcer.
Finkel: "Ladies and Gentlemen, this contest is scheduled for one fall and is a special challenge match. (sounds of Anime background music) Coming to ring with his manger, his parents, from Taylorville Illinois, standing at 5'4 and weighing 210 pounds. Todd "THE TOAD" Daugherty!!!!!!
Fans boo and throw anime dolls into the ring.
Finkel: And his opponent (sounds of Brother Stair's trumpet), from Belle Plaine Iowa with his manager, The Prophet Brother Stair, at 5'6 and weighing in at 300 POUNDS. Lloyd, LARDASS, Davies!!!
Fans boo and throw pizzas into the ring.
Finkel; Your referee is Woger Wiseman
Fans, this is the match 15 years in the waiting, you got a battle of wits, or lack of them. Both were previously ham radio operators in the past, trolls on the internet, and are two of the most hated men in the history of Nimbusters. You got the autism of the Toad versus the lard of the Lloyd. A momentual match up, that's to be sure.
DING DING (Bell rings)
Both men come out of their corners, only for Toad to run back to his to be consulted by his parents who order him back into the ring. Lloyd goes to his corner, picks up a cellphone, and orders pizza. But finally the two come out to face each other.
A stare down happens, Lloyd having a 2 inch height advantage and nearly 100 pounds on the Toad. Toad does his famous mugshot frown which starts making Lardass laugh on the ground. Toad takes advantage. Right, left, right, left. Lardass is staggering. Toad flings Lardass into the ropes, Lardass comes back and with his massive weight advantage knocks down the Toad. Jackhammer double fist hit by Lardass, followed by a headlock. Fans boo at the lack of action. Toad's parents yelling "You got this" while Lloyd glances at Brother Stair who yells "The day is coming soon".
Lardass drops the knee, then gets Toad to his feet, flings him into the ropes for a clothesline. A cover by Lardass and it's sloppy so Toad is able to kick out. Lloyd gets Toad off the ground, scoops him up, and power slams him to the mat. Again, a lousy cover by Lloyd, and a kick out by Toad at the count of 2. Lardass then goes for a big splash but Toad at the last second gets out of the way as Lardass goes splat into the mat. A cover now by Toad.. 1...2... But not enough Lardass kicks out with authority. Toad then goes to get Lardass off the mat by grabbing his hair, but then realizes lloyd HAS NO HAIR. Oh shit, what now? Toad does some knee drops and puts Davies into an armbar. Lloyd using his 300 pounds of power manages to power out of the move and get to his feet.
Crowd starting to get into the match now. Lloyd and Toad trades punches with Lloyd getting the upper han, staggering the Toad. Davies gets Toad up for a powerbomb and hits it perfectly. This might be the end for Toad. But Davies, being stupid, decides he is going to inflict more punishment. Davies gets Toad on his feet, takes him over the turnbuckle and rams his head into it.
But OH, what a MISTAKE by Lloyd. Toad has a 4 inch cranium and ramming his head into the turnbuckle has no effect. I think the Toad even likes it. Davies does it again and Toad is now starting to get FIRED UP from the head shots. A 3rd one by Davies and Toad turns to Davies, points to him and says "YOU!!!!!" Oh shit Lloyd is saying and Brother Stair looks worried. Right, left, right, left by Toad followed by a massive headbutt that drops Lardass like a statue getting torn down. This looks like the end for Davies. As Toad goes for the cover, Brother Stair distracts the ref..... "1...2....3....4....5 etc" but no ref to see the pinfall. Toad's parents start to complain to the ref now. While the ref is arguing with toad's parents, Stair throws in metal encased bible. Davies recovers enough to whack Daugherty with it then throws it out of the ring. Ref once again is paying attention, Toad is knocked out cold. Davies gets on the top rope, and splashes Toad with 300 pounds.. "1, 2, 3..." and you could count to a 100.
Your WINNER... Lloyd LARDASS Davies!!!!!!!!